Deliver Her from Evil Page 19

  He holds it up, allowing her flower and love token to dangle from his fingers. The sight of it is almost unbearable. She never takes it off, and here she is in her most vulnerable state, without it, without me.

  I take a deep breath and then wrap my hand around the cool metal. “Nabac dom gan, mo ghrá,” I murmur, as I rub my thumb across the engraving that is now stained with dried blood.

  “Forget me not, my love,” I repeat with more conviction, before turning and leaving the room. I walk through the doors, leaving my grief behind in search of whatever hope I can find.

  Fall 2015

  Campbell

  I walk through the doors of A Scone’s Throw and fight my way back to our table, but I’m met with stunned faces and Carly’s tears. I wasn’t going to miss this day for anything, but apparently the girls thought differently.

  I pull out my usual chair and take a seat at our table. “Did you really think I wouldn’t be here for this?” I ask them.

  “Well, yeah,” Carly chokes out. “You are supposed to be on that European tour. There were no open days in the schedule. How is this even possible?” she asks.

  The waitress comes over and places a water on the table in front of me and I thank her with a smile. “Some things came up, including this, so I took a few days off and flew home,” I explain.

  “Since when is it that easy?” Jen counters. “I’ve been on a tour, remember? They suck balls and there is no ‘I’m taking a few days off.’” She scowls at me, daring me to show my hand. I know she’s right; there is no time off during tour. It’s all or nothing.

  “I would rather not talk about it just yet. Today is Carly’s day,” I try to deflect. I’ve known Jen long enough to know she won’t settle for that explanation, so I packed my purse with souvenirs in preparation for sharing my secret, just in case I’m forced to.

  “We are a family, Campbell,” Carly says. “This isn’t my day; this is a special day for all of us.” Her smile beams and it makes me so thankful I was able to be here for this. I’ve actually been in town for a few days, but I wasn’t ready to see them all just yet. Lakin and I needed to get our own situation handled before explaining everything to them.

  “Did you quit? Did the tour end early? How is this even possible,” Vivian asks as she takes a drink of her coffee and places it back on the table.

  I wiggle in my chair and take a long pull of my ice water; I’m a little uncomfortable with the direction of the questions. I don’t really want this day to be about me; we should be focusing on Carly.

  “I’ve decided to quit for now,” I say quickly. When stunned looks bounce back at me, I continue with my vague explanation. “Lakin and I have other things we need to focus our attention on. As much as I love the job, I’m going to take some time away.”

  I’m immediately bombarded with a million questions from every direction.

  “Is there something wrong that we should know about?” Vivian asks.

  “I thought everything had healed from the surgery?” Jen says, panicked. “You need to tell us right now, what in the hell is going on.”

  “Music is your life; you can’t quit. What happened?” Carly demands, her smile fading and replaced with a look of concern.

  I had a feeling this would happen, which is why I brought presents. Knowing I can’t backtrack and rewind this conversation, I resign myself to divulge the information I have been hiding from them.

  “I’ve been back for a few days,” I exhale. “Lakin and I went to the doctor a few days ago, but we weren’t prepared for the news we got. I planned to tell you, but we needed a few days to process everything.”

  “Holy canola oil, you need to just say it,” Carly interrupts. “This has been the most difficult year of our lives, trying to move past everything that Jack did to us. I can’t bear to think about possibly losing you, so if you are sick or hurt, you need to just tell us.”

  I nod without a smile and reach into my bag for the presents within it and pull out the silver-wrapped gifts.

  “Oh fuck, she came with gifts; this is really bad,” Jen blurts out, fanning herself like she’s trying to hold tears in.

  Vivian and Carly wrap their hands and arms around each other as I push the gifts in front of them. Their eyes zero in on the packages, but they don’t move their hands to open them. Jen instantly pushes her gift back to me.

  “I can’t. I love gifts, but not like this. Take it away,” she insists.

  I laugh at all of them and push the package back in front of her. “Just open them,” I tell them reassuringly.

  They each hesitantly open their gifts and uncover the jewelry box inside. One by one, they pop open the top of the box and I’m met with three very different expressions. Vivian exhales loudly, Jen scowls, but Carly looks up at me with tears staining her cheeks.

  “I don’t get it,” Jen announces befuddled, lifting the silver charmed bracelet from its box. “How is this a clue about what’s going on with you?”

  I had each specially designed for them with a flower and a quote inscribed on the heart-shaped charm. Vivian’s with a clover, Jen’s with a dandelion, and Carly’s with a forget-me-not. She obviously didn’t look at the entire bracelet.

  “Read the back,” Vivian whispers forcefully in her direction.

  She flips it over and slowly reads the back to everyone at the table. “The only thing better than having you as a sister, is my children having you as their aunt.” Her eyes immediately bounce to mine.

  “But I thought…” Jen tappers off, pausing for a moment before continuing. “The damage from the attack would make it difficult if not impossible to have children?”

  I grab Carly’s trembling hand and snap the bracelet around her wrist. “Apparently not impossible after all,” I say, smiling at her. “The babies are due next spring.”

  Shocked, Jen spits out her coffee across the table and I dodge the path of the spray. “Babies, as in plural?” Jen asking, not even bothering to clean up her mess on the table. “You’re having twins?”

  I giggle at her reaction and simply nod.

  Carly gradually stands and pulls me up from my chair to stand with her. Her arms wrap around me and squeeze me tightly.

  “I’ve always been told you can’t choose your family,” she whispers in my ear. “They say you should hold them dear, because at times, your family will be all that you have.”

  She pulls away and squares her shoulders at me with every bit of confidence she can pull together, a confidence I don’t think I’ve ever seen. “Those people are wrong; the four of us have created a family together, all of us. I hold you dear not because I have to but because I want to and I’d sacrifice all I have to protect that family.”

  Jen and Vivian stand and circle their arms around us creating a group hug in the back section of the coffee house, a place that has been a staple over the last few years. We momentarily bask in one another’s comforting embrace.

  I back away with a smile and grab my purse, slinging it over my shoulder. “Now, let’s go add one more to this crazy family of ours.”

  The amount of people who walk through the courthouse doors is impressive; we look more like a mob ready for a rock show rather than witnesses at an adoption proceeding. Everyone is dressed in their very best and is lugging presents for Leah to officially welcome her into our little group.

  After the incident, I wasn’t convinced this day would happen. Leah was removed from Carly’s home that night and placed in a group home. She then wasn’t allowed back until the Department of Child Services could assess the safety of the situation and placement. Those months were extremely difficult for all of them. There were times that I thought they wouldn’t be able to weather the storm and would collapse under the strain of their grief.

  Chatter and laughter fill the room, and the vibration of everyone’s joy for the moment is seen on every face I see, except one…Leah’s. I watch as each member of our little gang takes turns saying things to her and pulling her into a big
hug, but each time she meets them with an uncomfortable smile.

  Her long blonde hair falls in front of her face to hide her anxious expression, but I see it, I see her.

  When Royce pulls Carly away from the group and Leah is left alone, I take my opportunity to talk with her, to tell her all of the things I wish Sharon had told me decades ago.

  She is sitting on the bench, her neatly pressed floral dress fits her perfectly, but she is obviously uncomfortable in it. I’m not surprised; dresses have probably never been in her wardrobe before Carly came into her life. I learned early that jeans and a hoodie were the route to go when you have a very limited amount of clothing. It makes it less obvious to your classmates that you have nothing, that you wear the same clothes every day. She no doubt has learned the same lesson.

  “You look very nice today, Leah,” I compliment as I take a seat on the bench next to her.

  “I’m not good with dresses,” she says as she pulls at the shoulder strap of the dress and then flattens the fabric across her knees. “I’m used to pants,” she adds in a whisper, a sense of shame rolling off her.

  I sigh loudly, knowing all too well the feelings she’s experiencing. “Me too, remember?” I tell her with a smile and a slight nudge with my knee. Her eyes meet mine, begging for reassurance.

  “You know I never got this far,” I tell her. “I grew very close with one of my foster parents and I thought maybe I would be adopted, but it just didn’t happen. I wished and wished to be in the seat you’re sitting in now.”

  “I know. I’m very thankful, excited even, but I’m so nervous,” she explains, her hands wrestling with each other with anxiety. “When I was in different placements or group homes, I just existed. I flew under the radar and stayed out of trouble, but there was never any pressure to be or do more than just survive.”

  She looks down at her dress again and fluffs the cloth. “That’s different now. I want this, I really do it’s just…” she pauses and looks around for any listening ears before continuing. “The world I knew is ending and I don’t know if I’ll be any good at living in my new world.”

  I nod and reach into my bag for the final gift I had prepared for today. I place the little box in her lap, and direct her to open it. As she carefully tears away the wrapping I begin my explanation of the gift, hoping she finds some comfort in my words.

  “When I was in the system, my life was a series of landings. I never knew where I would be landing next, and I was both hopeful and nervous about the idea of possibly finding a permanent home. What if I didn’t live up to their expectations? Adoption meant that a family would love me forever and help to give me a new life, what if I let them down?”

  Her shoulders sag as she grips onto the box. “Exactly,” she exhales. “I don’t want Carly to be disappointed in whoever I eventually become. I want to make her proud. Make her not regret taking a chance on me.”

  She opens the lid and uncovers my necklace that Sharon had once given me. I pick it up from the box and move her hair from her shoulders so that I can clasp the piece of jewelry around her neck.

  “This necklace was a gift from one of my foster parents on the day I was leaving her house. We remained close, her son even saved my life once, but I was never adopted by her. She gave me this to remember that no matter where I landed, no matter what direction life took me, there were people who loved me and to not lose myself in the journey.”

  As soon as the necklace is in place, I turn her to face me once again. “You see, Leah, life is going to be filled with good and bad, proud moments as well as times of disappointment. Carly is taking a step on this journey knowing that. So yes, the world that you know is ending but the journey toward a new beginning is within your grasp.”

  She grips onto the pendant, just as I had once done, evoking the emotion of a time I have worked to forget. “Let this necklace be a reminder that the path will be filled with uncertainty and hard times, but that nothing you have or will experience will diminish the love that this family has for you.”

  Leah smiles and wraps her arms around me. “Thank you, Campbell.”

  “It’s time, it’s time,” Liv exclaims, rushing up to us and tugging on the hem of Leah’s dress. “It’s our turn to make you my sister!” Liv jumps up and down with excitement, and Carly follows behind her, placing her hands on Liv’s shoulders to calm her down.

  Carly stretches her hand out to Leah and smiles brightly at her. “It’s our turn. Are you ready to make it official?” she asks.

  Leah looks to me momentarily before accepting Carly’s hand and standing up next to her. She takes a deep breath, adjusts her dress one last time, and takes a step toward the courtroom.

  I watch as Leah takes Olivia’s hand in hers, and with a look of confidence and determination announces, “I’m ready.”

  Vivian

  I don’t think our lives are anything like we expected.

  Heartache, heartbreak, happiness, friendship, love, loss, we have experienced them all, but somehow our stories of ruin have found hope. Jen, Campbell, and Carly, they are the family I choose for myself, and I am the family they chose.

  Will always told me that a love worth fighting for is a love worth waiting for. He was a man I fought for, and Brooks is the man I waited for. The love our group will celebrate today is both.

  “Jen is freaking out. You have got to get in there and talk her off the cliff,” Campbell says, peeking her head into the bathroom.

  I finish washing my hands and grab a towel to dry them, being extra careful not to wrinkle my satin dress. “Get that woman a shot. She told him she would do this, she has to follow through. Everyone is here already.”

  “Yeah, I’ll let you tell her that,” Cam adds before leaving as quickly as she appeared.

  I grab my flowers off the countertop and open the door to the main hallway. My heels click against the hardwood as I move closer to the bedroom, unfortunately the profanity gets louder the closer I get as well.

  “Son of a fucking bitch,” I hear Jen shout. “How in the hell am I supposed to do this?”

  I quickly open the door and shut it behind me to prevent anyone else from hearing her rant.

  As soon as she hears the click of the lock, Jen turns to me panicked. “I don’t think I can do this. This needs to be perfect.”

  I walk around her to peer over her shoulder. “Yes you can. You made a promise and you are a woman of your word. This will be so special, and I truly believe in you.”

  My words seem to calm her down, but a knock on the door sends Jen back into a spastic tizzy.

  “Jen, are you ready?” Royce asks from the other side of the door.

  Her eyes pop out of her head and she begins to scramble from table to table. “Stall!” she says in a frantic whisper.

  I wave her away and crack open the door. Royce stands before me, his tux is crisp, his shaggy hair cut short for the occasion and his goatee trimmed to perfection.

  “She needs just a few more minutes. She’s putting a few more final touches on everything,”

  He looks down at his watch and frowns. I don’t blame him, Jen should have had everything ready weeks ago, but she waited until the last minute.

  “It’s ready,” she shouts from behind me, and Royce noticeably relaxes. I open the door the rest of the way and Jen hands him the gift that she has been so feverishly assembling.

  He places his card on top and grins at both of us. “Thank you so much, Jen,” he says.

  “Are we square?” she asks, adjusting her dress.

  “You bet your ass,” he tells her, tucking the present under his arm, turning, and heading toward the room Carly is in.

  Jen and I follow close behind and are soon joined by Campbell who went in search of a tequila shot for Jen. Cam hands it to her and Jen slams it mid-stride.

  “Thanks, I fucking needed that,” she whispers to her.

  We don’t want to interrupt Royce’s moment, but we sure as hell aren’t going to miss it either, so we
follow close on his heels. We all soon reach her door, and Royce knocks.

  “It’s me, pink. I have something for you,” he says.

  “We’re out here, too,” Jen hollers. Everyone looks at her and scowls. “What? We are.”

  She cracks open the door, and reaches her hand through. Royce laces his fingers through hers and brings her hand to his mouth. When he plants a soft kiss on her knuckles, my stomach flutters with an anxious excitement for these two people, for my family that I love so dearly.

  “Don’t forget to read the card,” he says before kissing her hand one last time, handing me the present, and walking down the hall toward the backyard.

  As soon as he’s out of view, we give her the all clear and she opens the door. We all rush in and I hand her the gift-wrapped box.

  The three of us circle around her as she opens the lid to the box. Inside there are two Ping-Pong balls and the project that Jen had been working on. She picks the balls up and laughs, apparently at some inside joke she never mentioned to us.

  She then pulls the album out of the box and opens the front cover. Tears spring to her eyes as she slowly flips from page to page. Finally, when she share its contents with us, it becomes clear why Jen struggled with its completion and Carly’s emotion, because I too battle my own tears. We are silent, only sniffles filling the void as we see each page.

  Embossed across the cover is the simple phrase: Love is where you are.

  Every page is filled with photos of Carly with each of us, with her daughters, with Royce, special moments that Jen captured over that last couple of years. An entire section is left blank in the back, and it reads: Where our story continues.

  I rush to get tissues and hand her one to dab her eyes.

  “You made this, Jen?” Carly asks, wiping her tears away.

  “Royce asked me to put it together for you,” Jen explains. “He supervised every damn picture that went into it. I’ve worked with some demanding people, and that man took the cake. He wanted it perfect.”

  “It is,” she says, gripping onto the book and holding it close to her chest.